Kenyan gospel singer Mercy Masika’s upcoming marriage masterclass has sparked a wider debate among women about gender roles, expectations in marriage and whether women are often placed under greater pressure to make relationships work.

The programme, titled Becoming a Wife, is designed to guide women on marriage from a Christian perspective. However, its announcement has prompted questions about why marriage preparation programmes frequently focus on women while giving comparatively less attention to preparing men for their responsibilities as husbands.

Some women have argued that building a successful marriage should not be treated as a woman's responsibility alone. They maintain that both partners need to understand their roles, communicate effectively and contribute to the emotional, financial and practical demands of married life.

Others have questioned whether women are sometimes encouraged to endure difficult marriages in the name of commitment, patience and faith, even when the relationship involves persistent disrespect, emotional harm or abuse.

Women Question Unequal Expectations in Marriage

The debate reflects broader conversations about the expectations placed on women before and during marriage.

For example, some women have questioned why premarital counselling often emphasises a woman's conduct, submission and ability to manage a household, while men's readiness to provide emotional support, share domestic responsibilities and respect their partners receives less public attention.

Others have raised concerns about the advice given to women experiencing marital difficulties, arguing that messages about patience and perseverance should be accompanied by discussions about healthy boundaries, mutual respect and personal safety.

These concerns have also featured in wider discussions about gender-based violence and femicide in Kenya, with calls for stronger community responses and greater accountability for perpetrators.

However, supporters of faith-based marriage programmes argue that preparing women for marriage remains valuable, particularly when the guidance addresses communication, conflict resolution, personal growth and the realities of married life.

Mercy Masika's 'Becoming a Wife' Programme

Masika announced the Becoming a Wife masterclass as a programme for women seeking to approach marriage through Christian teachings.

The programme is scheduled to run from November 21 to December 12, 2026, with Lady Bishop Kathy Kiuna among the featured speakers.

In promoting the initiative, Masika wrote: "This is for every woman who believes marriage shouldn’t be miserable, who wants to get it right and trusts that God’s way is best."

The statement reflects the programme's emphasis on preparing women for marriage, although the ensuing debate has raised questions about how such preparation can be balanced with an equally strong emphasis on men's responsibilities.

The discussion does not necessarily mean that women should stop seeking marriage guidance. Rather, it raises a broader question about whether marriage education should place equal emphasis on preparing both partners for the commitments and responsibilities that come with building a family.

Ultimately, the debate highlights the importance of approaching marriage as a partnership in which both individuals contribute to building a respectful, supportive and healthy relationship.